Wednesday, December 21, 2011

In the beginning....

I don't think I have ever written a post about "us"... how we came to be, where we have been, what we have been through... this will probably be split up into a few posts just so I can cover it all, plus now that I am working I find blogging time is very difficult to find.  As it is this one took me a week to write!  But it just might be fun!  You can get to know me a little more!

A little about "us"...

We met on a blind date.  Its true.  We were so young and to be honest finding a boyfriend was the LAST thing on my mind.   I was only 19 (almost 20) when we met.  My roommate at the time was dating my husbands brother.  They met at a club while I was out of town and when I came back thought it would be fun to set us up. We went to a movie.  I can't recall what movie it was to be honest.  I thought he was HOT, and way out of my league.  I pretty much walked away from that date thinking that would be the last.   It wasn't.  Obviously.  I really didn't feel like I had the time, or desire to invest in a relationship.  I was working full time from 7-4 and going to beauty college from 5-10pm Monday through Friday.  I had been in a serious relationship the year before that left me feeling unsure about guys in general and well... smothered for lack of a better word.    We started hanging out quite a bit.  He would come over with his brother to our apartment and be there when I got home from school a few times a week.  Eventually my roomie and his brother ended their relationship.  I was sure that would be the end of our "hanging" out too.  Obviously it wasn't.  Here is why we worked... I didn't have his number, he didn't have mine.

Sounds crazy right?

It kind of was... but I NEEDED that sort of crazy, that non-smothering out of the ordinary thing.  I spent 3 years with someone who called me a million times a day, had to know where I was every second, bought me flowers weekly (or more often depending on the type of fight we had), left notes on my car, cards after cards after cards after CARDS, all in all he had me on a pedastool.  Sounds pretty great right?  It was... at first, but it got to be too much.  I really wasn't allowed to be myself.  I couldn't spend time with my friends or he would get mad, I couldn't do the things that most high school girls SHOULD be doing.  He actually would call my friends when they paged me (gads, how OLD am I?) and tell them to never call me again.  But he could do whatever he wanted.  And he did.  It took me over a year to get up the courage to really get out of that relationship.  He had a way of making me feel guilty whenever I tried to end things so I would stay.  I don't want to take anything away from that experience though.  I am sure it was a completely different experience for him.  I learned a lot about myself and we went through some things that most people don't have to go through. I will always cherish the lessons I learned for they made me who I am today.

So yes, the fact that he never called me was a total turn on.  I actually remember the first time he ever called me.  We had probably been dating for a few months.  I was at work, and he called to say hi and see how my day was going.  It was SO weird.  But it was sweet, and I really appreciated it, AND I remember it because it meant a lot to me.  I am sure at some point months into our dating we swapped numbers but to be honest I really don't have any other memories of phone conversations.  Just the one.  We started dating in July 1999 and were married on May 4th, 2000.  Short and sweet!  On May 10, 2000 (yes 6 days later) my husband left for basic training.  He had joined the ARMY.  I dropped out of Beauty school (Beauty school drop out....), quit my job and a few months later I was on my way to join him in El Paso, Texas.  I had never left Utah.  Never even wanted to.  I was terrified, pregnant and felt very very alone.  It was a rough first year (more like 10 ha ha ha) of marriage.  It was then that I think I started to develop anxiety issues.  I would have the worst nightmares.  Looking back, moving out of Utah was the best thing we ever did but it sure was scary at the time.....

to be continued....

I am trying to find some pictures from "those" days.


  1. Oh, this is fantastic! Thanks for sharing!

  2. Ohhhh I love it!!! You and Bjay are so cute, and that is a really sweet dating story! Thank you for sharing it, I was actually thinking on Sunday that I wanted to ask you how you guys met.

  3. oh! i just want to keep reading!!!so sweet! looking forward to next post!

  4. I'm so intrigued....can't wait to read the other posts!


  5. Aww I love dating stories! My husband and I met when I was 19 too, and we were married within 18 months of dating. Some people thought that was too fast, but when you know, you know, right? ;)

  6. Dang, I didn't want it to be over!!! I love reading stories like this :) My husband and I started dating in April 2001 and we were married August 2001, 10 years later, I can't believe we got married that fast, but when you know, you know.