Fa la la la la!

Hey guys!!!!

Been a while hasn't it? Well I am so happy to say that I am still working hard at meeting my gym goals each week. Last week I was sore non stop... took a couple days off and I am already sore again :) I LOVE it! It is such a good feeling. I have just been sticking with classes for now. Trust me getting an hour of gym time is nearly impossible as it is... so the last thing I want to do is have to put thought into what I am doing! It takes the guess work out of it for me. One less thing to STRESS about! Ha! Eventually I want to work back into doing what I love... TRAINING... and hitting those weights. I haven't been to the dark side (where all the big buff dudes hang) in so long I feel a little intimidated. Even though I know most of them... they haven't seen me in a long time and I cannot believe how much strength I have lost. I don't want to look like a wuss, lol! You guys... it is crazy... I can only do like 5 push ups. WHAT. IS. UP. WITH. THAT. Sigh. It will come back to me. It will, it will, it will!

Anyway, Christmas is just around the corner. I will be heading to Utah (to freeze my buns off) for the holidays. I have really been trying to get into the Christmas spirit... but that is really hard to do when 1, your husband is far far away... BOO... and 2, IT IS 85 DEGREES outside. SERIOUSLY! I love it, but it really makes it hard to believe Christmas is in a couple of weeks. I don't know if I will be back to the blog world until next year (that sounds weird) but I had to pop in with a quick update... and let you all know I am alive... and still trying to focus on some me time with my second love... GYM. I hope you are having a fantastic week, and I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Many blessings to come your way. Thanks for all the support, and encouraging words. I need it more than ever right now.

Boom Diggity....

Can I get a WHOOP WHOOP.... I just returned from the gym. I haven't been in SOOOOO long and it felt OH SO GOOD even though I only did an hour of cardio (mild cardio). I feel totally rejuvenated. Like a new person. Not only did I break a little sweat, but I got to visit with two of my favorite girls and THAT was like a breath of fresh air for me. I feel so out of touch with my friends right now, so out of touch with my husband (only because he isn't physically here) and sadly... so COMPLETELY out of touch with MYSELF and that is probably the main issue. That is what is making me out of touch with EVERYONE else.

I had a complete breakdown this past weekend. It was bad. Embarrassing. I think I am still recovering, especially since Monday I tried to put my cell phone in the fridge, and had oh... we'll just say a few little anxiety attacks at work. I don't really know if it is hormonal, exhaustion, stress induced or just the fact that I seem to have put my needs WAY on the back burner, but regardless... it happened. Monday at work I was sitting in the break room eating my lunch when one of the girls came back and we started talking. She is one of the most incredible people I have ever met. Very... whats the word... intuitive? She has me all figured out, lol! She told me to go home and research Sympathetic Nervous System. She said she felt like mine was a little "off". I came home and did just that. OMG... hit the nail on the head. It is EXACTLY what I am going through. EXACTLY what I am feeling... and guess what is one of the main triggers.... NOT EXERCISING. Seriously. I went from exercising EVERY day to a couple of times a week, to not at all. She convinced me that especially right now with everything that I have going on I need my second husband GYM in my life more than ever. I WILL find a way to fit him in because I do not want any more meltdowns. :)

What is your cardio of choice? (It is not my fav thing) and how much cardio do you do a day? Tomorrow I don't work so I am going to the gym first thing in the morning for a killer TKB class. PUMPED.

Fumes

Where has time gone? Ever feel like you are running on fumes? That is how I feel. I remember the days when I looked forward to the kids having school, and having that little bit of "me" time to hit the gym, shop, CLEAN... you know... the fun stuff. And now the only thing I look forward to is the weekend, where there is NO school, NO work, NO getting up early and working all day just to run around all night to various kid activities. Sigh. I. AM. EXHAUSTED. All the time. EXHAUSTED.

I realized the last couple of weeks that I need to make some changes. For my own sanity. The job I started when the kids were both in school full time was mainly to get me out of the house, a change of scenery, a little extra cash, but it was only meant to be 2-3 days a week. PERFECT! It has turned into 4-5 days a week (lately more like 5) which literally leaves me no time for myself. Don't get me wrong. I love my job, its fun, the girls are AWESOME. I get to socialize and laugh and meet new people. All of which I love but when I get home at the end of the day I am so wiped out that all I want to do is sit. BUT, being that I am a single mom right now there is no sitting. Its homework with the kids, dinner (which I usually eat standing up btw), bags packed for the next day, laundry, tidying up and before I know it its midnight and I crash and wake up at 6 am to do it all over again.

As soon as Christmas is over with (bah-humbug) and kids are back in school I am cutting my shifts at work down to 2-3 days a week. I have to. I NEED the gym back in my life. I MISS the stage... so much. I want to get back on it once or twice before we leave California for good. That means I have a lot of work to do in a very short amount of time. Since we don't know when we will be moving yet I am setting a goal for all of you to see.... (this is not written in stone folks, could very well change ha ha ha)

Ready???

MARCH 26, 2011

That is MY show :) It was my VERY first show 2 years ago, and my OVERALL win last year. I want to end the way I started, only better ha ha ha! So there is is 2011 MuscleContest you are MINE. You hear me? MINE!

Wish me luck. Now I am scared.